There are many things that we can do.

Firstly, if we come across somebody who has attempted to take their life, our immediate actions should be to:

1. Remove the person from that environment (wherever they attempted)

2. Take away whatever they used to attempt (whether that’s medication, rope, a weapon etc.)

3. Be with them, and don’t leave them by themselves

After taking these actions, the most important thing we can do is to refer the person. Rather than trying to help them all by ourselves, the person needs professional help. “Referring” them might look like doing a quick Google search for organisations or clinics in your area who they can see. It could look like helping them make that phone call, or offering to take them to their first appointment; whatever support that person needs to go and speak to a mental health professional.

It’s important to note that a person who is struggling with thoughts of suicide might not be willing to be referred, and you can’t force that. However, if the person has made an attempt or you know that they have taken actions in this direction (e.g. they’ve stored up medicine, purchased a gun, changed their will, etc.) then we have the responsibility to alert the authorities and refer them for help, because they’re not in the right mind to make that decision for themselves. Regardless of whether the person wants this help at the time, if we think they’re a danger to themselves or others then it’s important we take action.

If you’re in Australia or New Zealand, visit our Helplines page to view a list of helplines you can call. If you’re outside of this area, a quick Google search for ‘suicide helpline’ should help you find an organisation you can call.

Another thing we can do to help prevent suicide is to be well-versed in recognising the warning signs of someone who may be struggling with suicidal thoughts. Some of these signs include:

• Talking or writing about death or dying

• Talking or showing signs of self-harm

• Having means of self-harm, such as medication, guns, or poisonous substances

• An existing mental health condition that appears to be getting worse – especially depression

• Feelings of hopelessness

• People with psychotic symptoms

• Increased alcohol intake or substance abuse

• Withdrawal from family, friends or community

• Someone who makes a new will or changes to their existing will

• Someone who has recently started taking antidepressants

This is an important point to be aware of, because the side effects of going antidepressants can often include a higher risk of suicide. This is because when someone is severely depressed, they’re lethargic and lacking in motivation; so even though they might think they want to end their life, they don’t necessarily have the energy to carry that out. Once they start taking antidepressants however, their energy levels begin to improve and they now have the capacity to follow through on their thoughts of suicide. So if you’re a relative or friend of someone who’s started on antidepressants who has been thinking or contemplating suicide, be on the lookout.

When we suspect someone might be struggling with suicidal thoughts, there are a few questions we can ask.

• Have you been feeling depressed?

  • When you feel this way, have you thoughts of harming or killing yourself? We are often hesitant to ask this question, because we feel that if someone doesn’t have that thought already, we’re introducing it to them as an option – but studies show that we don’t need to be concerned about that, it’s actually the other way around. If someone has been having those thoughts and you ask this question, they will likely feel relieved that somebody is able to understand their experience, and feel valued that you’re taking how they feel seriously. If you don’t ask the question, you might miss someone who is suicidal. You’re not going to make it worse by asking.

• When and how often did you have these thoughts?

• What did you think of doing? When and where?

• When was the last time you had these thoughts?

• Have you acted on these thoughts in any way (like accumulating medication, buying poison, ropes, a gun, etc.)?

  • Have your thoughts ever included harming someone else as well as yourself? We increasingly hear of suicide and homicide together – for example, someone who wants to end their life but also kills their partner or children because they think there’s no point in leaving them behind.

• Have you made plans for your possessions or left a will or instructions?

• Have you thought about how your action will affect your loved ones?

• What has stopped you from acting on your thoughts so far?

• What do you think might help you cope with the way you’re feeling?

• How does talking about all this make you feel?

These are some of the questions you can ask if you suspect that somebody may be suicidal. A common worry we might have is feeling ill-equipped to deal with the answers a person might give us. What if they are suicidal, what then?

This brings us back to the best thing we can do: refer. We can only help and support a suicidal person so far, but what they really need is to see a trained professional.

As we’ve already mentioned, “referring” might look like doing a quick Google search for organisations or clinics in your area who this person can see, helping them make that phone call, or even offering to take them to their first appointment; whatever support that person needs to go and seek professional help.

Creating a ‘Safety Plan’